This post goes out to my good friend, Kerrie, who was sweet enough to notice that I missed my Monday post (we’ve been on vacation).  Kerrie, you, like Kermit and the gang, totally rock.

So, this week, I am featuring that most unlikely, but oh, so adorable performer, Kermit the Frog.  One of the lodestar’s of my life is this simple lyric, “Someday we’ll find it, The Rainbow Connection, The lovers, the dreamers and me.”

It may take a minute to make the connection, so please, be patient with me.  This came up because of the carnival that is the spectacle of Chick-Fil-A versus GLAAD.  Chick-Fil-A is and has always been a Christian business.  And when I say Christian business, they close on Sundays.  That’s putting your money where your Bible is.  Hey, good for them.  I find convictions refreshing, especially in the face of the almighty dollar.

Since the company has always been so upfront regarding their Christian convictions, why was anyone surprised by the following statement from Chick-Fil-A’s President, Dan Cathy?

“We are very much supportive of the family the biblical definition of the family unit. We are a family-owned business, a family-led business,” Cathy was quoted as saying.

Former presidential candidate, Mike Huckabee, rode to Chick-Fil-A’s defense, urging, “”No one is being asked to make signs, speeches or openly demonstrate. The goal is simple: Let’s affirm a business that operates on Christian principles and whose executives are willing to take a stand for the godly values we espouse by simply showing up and eating at Chick-fil-A on Wednesday, August 1,” wrote Huckabee.

Now, I actually like Huckabee, I don’t agree with a darn thing that comes out of that man’s mouth, but I’ll tell you what; he is sincere.  Huckabee has integrity and values.  They aren’t my values, but in this political landscape full of charlatans, when I see the real deal, even when it isn’t my deal… hey, I have to salute that.

Back to Huckabee and Cathy’s statements, I find these almost comical.  Have Christians NOT read their Bible?  Me, a moralistic heathen (not to be confused with pagan… that’s different- look it up), actually seem to have read more of the Bible than many of the good Christian people I meet.  Here’s what the Bible has to say about marriage, family and familial relationships.  If there’s something you object to, please, take it up with God, I didn’t write the book.

1.) As to courtship:  “If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered, he shall pay the girl’s father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the girl, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives.”  Deuteronomy 22:28-29

2.) How about defining marriage?  Gee, well, Jacob, one of the “patriarchs” had four wives: Leah, Rachel, Bilhah and Zilpah.  Leah and Rachel were sisters and Jacob’s first cousins. By whom he had one daughter, Dinah and twelve sons: Reuben, Simeon, Levi, Judah, Zebulun, Issachar, Dan, Gad, Asher, Naphtali, Joseph and Benjamin (A wonderful fictional account of Dinah’s life can be seen in 1997’s The Red Tent by Anita Diamont.)  Jacob’s story is found in Genesis chapters 25-37, 42, 45-49.

3.) On seeking a wife: Paul is gave his permission for a man to marry his own daughter 1 Corinthians 7:36-38, Abraham married his half-sister, Sarai, later Sarah, Genesis 20:12, Nachor (Abraham’s brother) married his niece Malcha Genesis 11:26-29, and then there is Jochabed who was simultaneously Moses’ mother and great-aunt, ugh, neat trick. Exodus 6:19-20 Lastly, there is the tragic tale of Amnon, son of David and brother to Absalom, who fell in love with and raped his sister Thomar.  Don’t worry, yes, Absalom killed him two years later in revenge and, yes, do worry, Jesus was descended from the House of David. II Kings 13:1-14

4.) Appropriate wifely behavior: “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.  For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.”  Ephesians 5:22-23 Um, no.  Marriage is a meeting of two passionately committed equals.  What happened to taken from the rib?  So as to be beside our husbands? Submit? Please, as if.

5.) On father/daughter relationships:  ” Genesis 19:30-36 And Lot went up out of Zoar, and dwelt in the mountain, and his two daughters with him; for he feared to dwell in Zoar: and he dwelt in a cave, he and his two daughters.
31 And the firstborn said unto the younger, Our father is old, and there is not a man in the earth to come in unto us after the manner of all the earth:
32 Come, let us make our father drink wine, and we will lie with him, that we may preserve seed of our father.
33 And they made their father drink wine that night: and the firstborn went in, and lay with her father; and he perceived not when she lay down, nor when she arose.
34 And it came to pass on the morrow, that the firstborn said unto the younger, Behold, I lay yesternight with my father: let us make him drink wine this night also; and go thou in, and lie with him, that we may preserve seed of our father.
35 And they made their father drink wine that night also: and the younger arose, and lay with him; and he perceived not when she lay down, nor when she arose.
36 Thus were both the daughters of Lot with child by their father.

Oh, and by the way, this was after said righteous man (father) offered to allow an angry crowd to rape both daughters.  For this hedonistic act he was spared the fire that rained down on Sodom and Gomorrah, because he alone, of Sodom offered strangers hospitality.  For me? Categorize under things that make me go… “Hmmmm.”

6.) More on fathers and daughters: “”When a man sells his daughter as a slave, she will not be freed at the end of six years as the men are.” Exodus 21:7

I could go on, but there is so much, it hardly seems sporting.  While there are more gentle and sentimental expressions of marriage, most do not involve getting a priest and a legal sanction, just the whole love one another, be fruitful and multiple. (Seems to send sort of a mixed message regarding unwed mothers, don’t you think?)  Frankly, I have to ask, WHAT DEFINITION are these yokels talking about?  Show me chapter and verse, please?  Because, I have to be honest, Biblical marriage can stick a sock in it.  If you think I’m going to go along with my husband taking three wives (including my sister???), raping a family member, hooking up with an aunt, raping a virgin, whatever, you can forget it.  To be blunt, he doesn’t have the spare time.

And this again goes back to the statement I’ve made so many times.  The Religious Right cherry picks their religion.  There are dozens of references to marriage in the Bible and only six that might even be misconstrued to reference homosexuality and, yet, somehow, every evil is the gays’ fault.  I cry Shenanigans… AGAIN… STILL!!!

Okay, so let’s come away from the fascinating world that is the Bible, and, honestly, it is fascinating.  Those Judeo-Christians; you name it, they did it.  You have to be asking yourself what Chick-Fil-A, the Biblical definition of marriage and the adorable Muppets have in common.  Simple, the Jim Henson Studio (currently owned by the Disney Corp.) was making little toys from their Creature Workshop to go into kids’ meals at the time that Cathy spouted off about Biblical marriage.  One day later Lisa Henson (daughter of the late, great, awesome, Jim) announced that the Jim Henson Studio would be severing ties with Chick-Fil-A and all payments they’d received from their relationship with the fast food chain would be donated to GLAAD.

So, apologies for the delay, but here is this week’s featured selection: The Rainbow Connection.  ENJOY!!!

A real giggle comes with Chick-Fil-A’s subsequent press release which announced that THEY had severed ties with The Jim Henson Studios a day earlier.  So… you can’t fire me- I quit!  Or you can’t break up with me, because, I’m dumping you!  Whatever.  juvenile, even for a fast food chain.

Down to basics, folks.  All of us, can spend our dollars, yen, Euros, sheckles, in any way we see fit.  Then we can give our money to any political institution we want to.  Companies can do that, too.  And yes, we can penalize it.  It’s a two-way street.  Chick-Fil-A’s chicken is yummy, honestly, it truly is, but while they assert they never discriminate again anyone based on the basis of color, gender, religious views or, yes, sexual orientation, that fact remains that each year they give hefty political donations to groups that I see as intolerant, narrow-minded and bigoted in the worst way.  Regretfully, my dollars will find other homes.  People who agree with these, in my opinion, cruel and antiquated views can, naturally, support this business.

I have a real problem with politicians jumping into the mix.  While deplorable, Chick-Fil-A’s views do not break any laws and the owners are entitled to their opinions.  This is how free speech works.  For cities like Boston to say they will never allow a Chick-Fil-A to open there and will pass laws to that effect seems to me to be over-legislating.  I liked this take on the free speech aspect:

Other Businesses That Take Their Religion Seriously:

1.) Forever 21

2.) Tom’s of Maine

3.) Tyson Foods

4.) Hobby Lobby

5.) ServiceMaster (Terminix, American Home Shield)

6.) Herman Miller

7.) Interstate Batteries

8.) In and Out Burger

9.) Walmart

However, they are entitled to their opinions and to their huge donations to Super-PAC’s that fight against everything I hold dear in life.  And, again, I and YOU are entitled to our opinions and to choose to spend our money where we see fit.  No politicians needed, just freedom of speech exercised on both sides.  Now, that’s American!

Far be it for me to leave you with such a glum ending… no, much better to exit with Kermit… he’s like bacon, everything is better with a little Kermit.

Kermit the Frog

Why are there so many
Songs about rainbows
And what’s on the other side
Rainbow’s are visions
They’re only illusions
And rainbows have nothing to hide
So we’ve been told and some chose to
Believe it
But I know they’re wrong wait and see

Someday we’ll find it
The Rainbow Connection
The lovers, the dreamers and me

Who said that every wish
Would be heard and answered
When wished on the morning star
Somebody thought of that
And someone believed it
And look what it’s done so far
What’s so amazing
That keeps us star gazing
What so we think we might see

Someday we’ll find it
That Rainbow Connection
The lovers the dreamers and me

Have you been half asleep
And have you heard voices
I’ve heard them calling my name
Are these the sweet sounds that called
The young sailors
I think they’re one and the same
I’ve heard it too many times to ignore it
There’s something that I’m supposed to be

Someday we’ll find it
The Rainbow Connection
The lovers, the dreamers and me

Sing it, Kermit!