It seems asinine to even type the words.  It seems impossible that they could be needed.  Yet, there it is, I am moved to defend the Girl Scouts of America.

Their nemesis?  The usual.  Seems some misguided product of deep genetic inbreeding  (just my personal guess), misogynistic cretin has decided that the Girl Scouts of America are brainwashing little girls to become demented, communist lesbians.

Mind you, the lesbian thing  doesn’t worry me.

Except that I know that from this bile-filled slug it’s a license to hate, to attack, to abuse, to debase.  It’s a license for violence and that does worry me.

Let me back up.  Perhaps four weeks ago, a friend sent me a link regarding a boycott and denunciation of the Girl Scouts of America.  I clicked on it, and while inflammatory, it was one small-minded little pastor named Kevin Swanson who had his man toy all tied up knots over the idea that the Girl Scouts were, in his words, raising girls “with the worldview of feminism, socialism and communism, the independent mindset, the worldview that is presented by the Girl Scouts of America.” (Source: You can listen to his radio “show” here.)  His solution?  A nationwide boycott of the girls’ main fundraiser- don’t buy the cookies.

(I am fighting the urge to make a “Don’t drink the kool-aid” remark here.  Drat, too late.)

Looking at it, this was simply one more nutjob doing his level best to nutty and, well, I’m kind of busy, so I sort of put it aside for a while.  I mean, we’re talking kids here, people.  Really?

Today I had a sick child (coincidentally, a Girl Scout, thank you very much) sent home from school, so my day morphed and I spent a bit more time researching possible blog topics for my Musical Monday Blog while she napped.  Thinking of my friend’s suggestion, I did a little digging, just wondering if said nutjob (again, my unprofessional opinion) had seen any traction on his whole Girl Scouts are evil and don’t buy their cookies extravaganza.

Would you believe there is a whole nutjob website dedicated to a boycott of Girl Scout Cookies?  They call it a “Cookie-cott.”  They claim the scouts are being turned into socialist, communist, feminist (not mad at that one by the way) lesbians.

Here’s their beef:

WHAT :  We’re boycotting Girl Scout cookies since GS’ national leadership continues to show its attachment to pro-abortion leaders and organizations.   FALSE

WHY:  We boycott now because of Girl Scout praise for Wendy Davis and Kathleen Sebelius. And because of a deep and lasting entanglement with abortion providers and abortion rights organizations.  FALSE AGAIN

HOW:  Give this flier to adults at cookie sales to explain why you are not buying. Share the flyer with your friends! (There’s a download button for you to spread the hate.  Yep, you too, can smear the Brownies… and the Daisies.  Go team.)  STRIKE THREE???  WHO ACTUALLY DOES THIS??

On the record- Girl Scouts of America have never advocated NOR been associated with any abortion advocacy groups and have never been involved with any abortion providers.  One can see the Girl Scouts website as they address these topics, thanks to similar attacks in 2011 and 2012.  Wendy Davis and Kathleen Sebelius were mentioned in passing at an international gathering of the World Association of Girl Guides and Girl Scouts as examples of women who had been attacked for their opinions, not endorsed as this site claims.

Hey, say the cookies are fattening.  Say, they’re pricey.  I get that.  But… this site is just LIES.  Literally, they are making smut up.

I have two daughters in scouts and I serve on two co-op troops of moms and a couple dads who work together to provide the structure and support that scouting requires.  It’s a lot of work, but the girls love it and I am proud of both my daughters’ accomplishments.  My hope is that both of them will achieve the Gold Award (The GS equivalent to  the Eagle Scout).  Along that journey are friendships to be forged, lessons to be learned, failures waiting, and victories that will be so much sweeter for all the work invested in them.

I can tell you that across these two troops, we have a wide range of religions, economic status, and political beliefs.  NONE of that ever comes up.  You know why?  It’s not the place.  We’re too busy.  We’re teaching scouts how to build a fire, we’re volunteering at the food bank, we’re putting together care packages for the troops, learning how to change a flat bicycle tire, and sing campfire songs.  We are busy with LIFE.  Our daughters are diving into their futures and we are helping them get there, and yes, cookie sales help.  Something has to pay for the archery targets and high ropes courses.

Our daughters are oblivious to your petty psuedo-political agenda.  They are busy with life.  Maybe you should get one, Mr. Swanson, Cookie Cott, instead of picking on children.

Everyone involved in girl scouting has the same aim.  We want to nurture these girls into healthy, strong, loving young women capable of forging their own path, embracing life, and making their best choices.  Hey, if that image, one of whole, beautiful vibrant young minds going out and making the world theirs scares you, then, I’m sorry, that says everything about YOU and not a damn thing about our daughters.

This one’s for the girls… love, dream, wish upon a star, and don’t worry, we’ve got your back.  Thank you, Martina McBride, for such a loving and uplifting song about the bonds that link us all.  We’re all the same.

And we’re beautiful.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oTowId2CWHA

“This One’s For The Girls”

This one’s for all you girls about thirteen
High school can be so rough, can be so mean
Hold onto, on to your innocence
Stand your ground when everyone’s giving in

This one’s for the girls

This is for all you girls about twenty-five
In a little apartment, just trying to get by
Living on, on dreams and spaghetti-o’s
Wondering where you life is gonna go

This one’s for the girls
Who’ve ever had a broken heart
Who’ve wished upon a shooting star
You’re beautiful the way you are
This one’s for the girls
Who love without holding back
Who dream with everything they have
All around the world
This one’s for the girls

This is for all you girls about forty-two
Tossing pennies into the Fountain of Youth
Every laugh, laugh line on your face
Made you who you are today

This one’s for the girls
Who’ve ever had a broken heart
Who’ve wished upon a shooting star
You’re beautiful the way you are
This one’s for the girls
Who love without holding back
Who dream with everything they have
All around the world
This one’s for the girls

Yeah, we’re all the same inside (same inside)
>From 1 to 99

This one’s for the girls
Who’ve ever had a broken heart
Who’ve wished upon a shooting star
You’re beautiful the way you are
This one’s for the girls
Who love without holding back
Who dream with everything they have
All around the world
This one’s for the girls
Yeah, this one’s for the girls

The girls

The girls

The Girl Scout Promise

On my honor, I will try:
To serve God and my country,

To help people at all times,
And to live by the Girl Scout Law.

The Girl Scout Law

I will do my best to be
honest and fair,

friendly and helpful,
considerate and caring,
courageous and strong, and
responsible for what I say and do,
and to
respect myself and others,

respect authority,
use resources wisely,
make the world a better place, and
be a sister to every Girl Scout.

This post was written by Erika Gardner.  If you enjoyed it, please sign up to receive updates on this blog.  Or you can follow Erika on Twitter @Erika_Gardner or “Like” her Facebook page Erika Gardner- Writer and Storyteller.  Check out her contributions to the BBB Blog.