Hi all, yep, still behind, but slowly wading my way out of the detritus. Still, it has been a happy sort of detritus. When perhaps I might have been writing on my blog I have been spending time with family and dear friends or working on my next novel The Dragon in the Garden. I simply need more hours in the day as my running has been suffering as well. There are worse problems to have, I suppose.
That being said, as wonderful as things currently are at present, one still has regrets and this week’s song represents one of mine. I’ve found myself in one of those situations where, completely through my own actions, I think I screwed up a relationship. Now, I’m not sure, thanks to a situation of radio silence between we two, although I have the sneaking suspicion that trying to apologize and have a conversation designed to fix things would likely drive the person further away. Perhaps time will help mend the rift? Perhaps there is no rift, just something all in my head? I don’t know, but I do think, in the words of this song, “I really f***ed it up this time.”
Right now the people reading my blog are saying, what song, Erika? Oops, sorry, sort of skipped that part. The song is Little Lion Man by Mumford and Sons:
Such a catchy, fun, folky song. One simply has to sing along (radio edits usually substitute the word “messed” for the f-word). This is a song that can mean different things to different people. Front man Marcus Mumford said of Little Lion Man, “It’s a very personal story, so I won’t elaborate upon too much. Suffice to say, it was a situation in my life I wasn’t very happy with or proud of… and sometimes when you can’t describe a feeling with your own words, it’s almost easier to express in a song. .. the song should stand on its own and people draw their own interpretation from the words.”
For me, I see the Little Lion Man of the song as the brash, impulsive, slightly naive child still living inside each of us. I see the singer talking to that inner child and explaining, I (the adult me) blew it. I should have kept a tighter leash on that child (actual complete honesty is rarely allowed between grown-ups) and now we both feel very badly about things. I think the song is also about one of those really, profoundly uncomfortable moments when there is simply no escaping the fact that this time, the blame lies squarely on our shoulders. We chose this course of action and now it’s time to pay the piper.
Just wish I knew what currency the piper accepted.
Wow, there’s a whole, huge lesson for our politicians on accountability for one’s actions there, but I shall refrain.
Here are the lyrics… so that you may draw your own meaning from them as Mr. Mumford would have you do.
Lyrics to Little Lion Man :
Weep for yourself, my man,
You’ll never be what is in your heart
Weep Little Lion Man,
You’re not as brave as you were at the start
Rate yourself and rake yourself,
Take all the courage you have left
Wasted on fixing all the problems
That you made in your own head
But it was not your fault but mine
And it was your heart on the line
I really fucked it up this time
Didn’t I, my dear?
Didn’t I, my…
Tremble for yourself, my man,
You know that you have seen this all before
Tremble Little Lion Man,
You’ll never settle any of your scores
Your grace is wasted in your face,
Your boldness stands alone among the wreck
Now learn from your mother or else spend your days Biting your own neck
But it was not your fault but mine
And it was your heart on the line
I really fucked it up this time
Didn’t I, my dear? (x2)
Didn’t I, my dear?
Ahhhhh……
But it was not your fault but mine
And it was your heart on the line
I really fucked it up this time
Didn’t I, my dear? (x2)
Didn’t I, my dear?
